第七回

第七回 花和尚倒拔垂杨柳 豹子头误入白虎堂

诗曰：

在世为人保七旬，何劳日夜弄精神。

世事到头终有尽，浮花过眼总非真。

贫穷富贵天之命，事业功名隙里尘。

得便宜处休欢喜，远在儿孙近在身。

话说那酸枣门外三二十个泼皮破落户中间，有两个为头的，一个叫做过街老鼠张三，一个叫做青草蛇李四。这两个为头接将来，智深也却好去粪窖边，看见这伙人都不走动，只立在窖边，齐道：“俺特来与和尚作庆。”智深道：“你们既是邻舍街坊，都来廨宇里坐地。”张三、李四便拜在地上，不肯起来，只指望和尚来扶他，便要动手。智深见了，心里早疑忌道：“这伙人不三不四，又不肯近前来，莫不要洒家？那厮却是倒来捋虎须，俺且走向前去，教那厮看洒家手脚。”

智深大踏步近前，去众人面前来。那张三、李四便道：“小人兄弟们特来参拜师父。”口里说，便向前去，一个来抢左脚，一个来抢右脚。智深不等他占身，右脚早起，腾的把李四先踢下粪窖里去。张三恰待走，智深左脚早起，两个泼皮都踢在粪窖里挣侧。后头那二三十个破落户，惊的目瞪痴呆，都待要走，智深喝道：“一个走的，一个下去！两个走的，两个下去！”众泼皮都不敢动掸。只见那张三、李四在粪窖里探起头来。原来那座粪窖没底似深，两个一身臭屎，头发上蛆虫盘满，立在粪窖里，叫道：“师父，饶恕我们！”智深喝道：“你那众泼皮，快扶那鸟上来，我便饶你众人。”众人打一救，搀到葫芦架边，臭秽不可近前。智深呵呵大笑道：“兀那蠢物，你且去菜园池子里洗了来，和你众人说话。”两个泼皮洗了一回，众人脱件衣服与他两个穿了。

智深叫道：“都来廨宇里坐地说话。”智深先居中坐了，指着众人道：“你那伙鸟人，休要瞒洒家，你等都是什么鸟人，来这里戏弄洒家？”那张三、李四并众火伴一齐跪下，说道：“小人祖居在这里，都只靠赌博讨钱为生。这片菜园是俺们衣饭碗，大相国寺里几番使钱要奈何我们不得。师父却是那里来的长老？恁的了得！相国寺里不曾见有师父。今日我等愿情伏侍。”智深道：“洒家是关西延安府老种经略相公帐前提辖官，只为杀的人多，因此情愿出家，五台山来到这里。洒家俗姓鲁，法名智深。休说你这三二十个人直什么，便是千军万马队中，俺敢直杀的入去出来！”众泼皮喏喏连声，拜谢了去。智深自来廨宇里房内，收拾整顿歇卧。

次日，众泼皮商量，凑些钱物，买了十瓶酒，牵了一个猪，来请智深。都在廨宇安排了，请鲁智深居中坐了，两边一带坐定那二三十泼皮饮酒。智深道：“什么道理，叫你众人们坏钞。”众人道：“我们有福，今日得师父在这里，与我等众人做主。”智深大喜。吃到半酣里，也有唱的，也有说的，也有拍手的，也有笑的。正在那里喧哄，只听得门外老鸦哇哇的叫。众人有扣齿[1]的，齐道：“赤口上天，白舌入地[2]。”智深道：“你们做什么鸟乱？”众人道：“老鸦叫，怕有口舌。”智深道：“那里取这话！”那种地道人笑道：“墙角边绿杨树上新添了一个老鸦巢，每日只咶到晚。”众人道：“把梯子去上面拆了那巢便了。”有几个道：“我们便去。”智深也乘着酒兴，都到外面看时，果然绿杨树上一个老鸦巢。众人道：“把梯子上去拆了，也得耳根清净。”李四便道：“我与你盘上去，不要梯子。”智深相了一相，走到树前，把直裰脱了，用右手向下，把身倒缴着，却把左手拔住上截，把腰只一趁，将那株绿杨树带根拔起。众泼皮见了，一齐拜倒在地，只叫：“师父非是凡人，正是真罗汉！身体无千万斤气力，如何拔得起！”智深道：“打甚鸟紧！明日都看洒家演武使器械。”众泼皮当晚各自散了。从明日为始，这二三十个破落户见智深匾匾的伏，每日将酒肉来请智深，看他演武使拳。

过了数日，智深寻思道：“每日吃他们酒食多矣，洒家今日也安排些还席。”叫道人去城中买了几般果子，沽了两三担酒，杀翻一口猪，一腔羊。那时正是三月尽，天气正热。智深道：“天色热！”叫道人绿槐树下铺了芦席，请那许多泼皮团团坐定。大碗斟酒，大块切肉，叫众人吃得饱了，再取果子吃酒。又吃得正浓，众泼皮道：“这几日见师父演力，不曾见师父家生器械，怎得师父教我们看一看也好。”智深道：“说的是。”自去房内取出浑铁禅杖，头尾长五尺，重六十二斤。众人看了，尽皆吃惊，都道：“两臂膊没水牛大小气力，怎使得动！”智深接过来，飕飕的使动，浑身上下，没半点儿参差。众人看了，一齐喝采。

智深正使得活泛，只见墙外一个官人看见，喝采道：“端的使得好！”智深听得，收住了手看时，只见墙缺边立着一个官人。怎生打扮？但见：

头戴一顶青纱抓角儿头巾，脑后两个白玉圈连珠鬓环。身穿一领单绿罗团花战袍，腰系一条双搭尾龟背银带。穿一对磕瓜头朝样皂靴，手中执一把折叠纸西川扇子。

那官人生的豹头环眼，燕颔虎须，八尺长短身材，三十四五年纪，口里道：“这个师父端的非凡，使的好器械！”众泼皮道：“这位教师喝采，必然是好。”智深问道：“那军官是谁？”众人道：“这官人是八十万禁军枪棒教头林武师，名唤林冲。”智深道：“何不就请来厮见？”那林教头便跳入墙来。两个就槐树下相见了，一同坐地。林教头便问道：“师兄何处人氏？法讳唤做甚么？”智深道：“洒家是关西鲁达的便是。只为杀的人多，情愿为僧。年幼时也曾到东京，认得令尊林提辖。”林冲大喜，就当结义智深为兄。智深道：“教头今日缘何到此？”林冲答道：“恰才与拙荆一同来间壁岳庙里还香愿。林冲听得使棒，看得入眼，着女使锦儿自和荆妇去庙里烧香，林冲就只此间相等，不想得遇师兄。”智深道：“洒家初到这里，正没相识，得这几个大哥每日相伴，如今又得教头不弃，结为弟兄，十分好了。”便叫道人再添酒来相待。

恰才饮得三杯，只见女使锦儿慌慌急急，红了脸，在墙缺边叫道：“官人，休要坐地！娘子在庙中和人合口[3]！”林冲连忙问道：“在那里？”锦儿道：“正在五岳楼下来，撞见了诈奸不级的，把娘子拦住了，不肯放。”林冲慌忙道：“却再来望师兄，休怪，休怪！”林冲别了智深，急跳过墙缺，和锦儿径奔岳庙里来。抢到五岳楼看时，见了数个人拿着弹弓、吹筒、粘竿，都立在栏干边。胡梯上一个年小的后生，独自背立着，把林冲的娘子拦着道：“你且上楼去，和你说话。”林冲娘子红了脸道：“清平世界，是何道理，把良人调戏！”林冲赶到跟前，把那后生肩胛只一扳过来，喝道：“调戏良人妻子，当得何罪！”恰待下拳打时，认的是本管高太尉螟蛉之子高衙内。原来高俅新发迹，不曾有亲儿，无人帮助，因此过房这高阿叔高三郎儿子在房内为子。本是叔伯弟兄，却与他做干儿子，因此高太尉爱惜他。那厮在东京倚势豪强，专一爱淫垢人家妻女。京师人惧怕他权势，谁敢与他争口，叫他做花花太岁。

当时林冲扳将过来，却认得是本管高衙内，先自手软了。高衙内说道：“林冲，干你甚事，你来多管？”原来高衙内不认得他是林冲的娘子，若还认得时，也没这场事。见林冲不动手，他发这话。众多闲汉见闹，一齐拢来劝道：“教头休怪，衙内不认的，多有冲撞。”林冲怒气未消，一双眼睁着瞅那高衙内。众闲汉劝了林冲，和哄高衙内出庙上马去了。

林冲将引妻小并使女锦儿，也转出廊下来，只见智深提着铁禅杖，引着那二三十个破落户，大踏步抢入庙来。林冲见了，叫道：“师兄，那里去？”智深道：“我来帮你厮打！”林冲道：“原来是本官[4]高太尉的衙内，不认得荆妇，时间无礼。林冲本待要痛打那厮一顿，太尉面上须不好看。自古道：不怕官，只怕管。林冲不合吃着他的请受[5]，权且让他这一次。”智深道：“你却怕他本官太尉，洒家怕他甚鸟！俺若撞见那撮鸟时，且教他吃洒家三百禅杖了去。”林冲见智深醉了，便道：“师兄说得是。林冲一时被众人劝了，权且饶他。”智深道：“但有事时，便来唤洒家与你去。”众泼皮见智深醉了，扶着道：“师父，俺们且去，明日再得相会。”智深提着禅杖道：“阿嫂休怪，莫要笑话。阿哥，明日再得相会。”智深相别，自和泼皮去了。林冲领了娘子并锦儿取路回家，心中只是郁郁不乐。

且说这高衙内引了一班儿闲汉，自见了林冲娘子，又被他冲散了，心中好生着迷，怏怏不乐，回到府中纳闷。过了三两日，众多闲汉都来伺候，见衙内自焦，没撩没乱[6]，众人散了。数内有一个帮闲的，唤作干鸟头富安，理会得高衙内意思，独自一个到府中伺候。见衙内在书房中闲坐，那富安走近前去道：“衙内近日面色清减，心中少乐，必然有件不悦之事。”高衙内道：“你如何省得？”富安道：“小子一猜便着。”衙内道：“你猜我心中甚事不乐？”富安道：“衙内是思想那‘双木’的。这猜如何？”衙内笑道：“你猜得是。只没个道理得他。”富安道：“有何难哉！衙内怕林冲是个好汉，不敢欺他，这个无伤。他见在帐下听使唤，大请大受，怎敢恶了太尉？轻则便刺配了他，重则害了他性命。小闲[7]寻思有一计，使衙内能勾得他。”高衙内听的，便道：“自见了多少好女娘，不知怎的只爱他，心中着迷，郁郁不乐。你有甚见识能勾他时，我自重重的赏你。”富安道：“门下知心腹的陆虞候陆谦，他和林冲最好。明日衙内躲在陆虞候楼上深阁，摆下些酒食，却叫陆谦去请林冲出来吃酒。教他直去樊楼[8]上深阁里吃酒，小闲便去他家对林冲娘子说道：‘你丈夫教头和陆谦吃酒，一时重气，闷倒在楼上，叫娘子快去看哩。’赚得他来到楼上。妇人家水性，见了衙内这般风流人物，再着些甜话儿调和他，不由他不肯。小闲这一计如何？”高衙内喝采道：“好条计！就今晚着人去唤陆虞候来分付了。”原来陆虞候家只在高太尉家隔壁巷内。次日，商量了计策，陆虞候一时听允，也没奈何，只要衙内欢喜，却顾不得朋友交情。

且说林冲连日闷闷不已，懒上街去，巳牌时，听得门首有人叫道：“教头在家么？”林冲出来看时，却是陆虞候，慌忙道：“陆兄何来？”陆谦道：“特来探望，兄何故连日街前不见？”林冲道：“心里闷，不曾出去。”陆谦道：“我同兄长去吃三杯解闷。”林冲道：“少坐拜茶。”两个吃了茶起身。陆虞候道：“阿嫂，我同兄长到家去吃三杯。”林冲娘子赶到布帘下，叫道：“大哥，少饮早归。”

林冲与陆谦出得门来，街上闲走了一回。陆虞候道：“兄长，我们休家去，只就樊楼内吃两杯。”当时两个上到樊楼内，占个阁儿，唤酒保分付，叫取两瓶上色好酒，希奇果子案酒。两个叙说闲话，林冲叹了一口气，陆虞候道：“兄长何故叹气？”林冲道：“贤弟不知，男子汉空有一身本事，不遇明主，屈沉在小人之下，受这般腌的气！”陆虞候道：“如今禁军中虽有几个教头，谁人及得兄长的本事，太尉又看承得好，却受谁的气？”林冲把前日高衙内的事告诉陆虞候一遍，陆虞候道：“衙内必不认的嫂子。如此也不打紧，兄长不必忍气，只顾饮酒。”林冲吃了八九杯酒，因要小遗，起身道：“我去净手了来。”林冲下得楼来，出酒店门，投东小巷内去净了手。回身转出巷口，只见女使锦儿叫道：“官人，寻得我苦，却在这里！”林冲慌忙问题：“做甚么？”锦儿道：“官人和陆虞候出来，没半个时辰，只见一个汉子慌慌急急奔来家里，对娘子说道：‘我是陆虞候家邻舍。你家教头和陆谦吃酒，只见教头一口气不来，便重倒了，只叫娘子且快来看视。’娘子听得，连忙央间壁王婆看了家，和我跟那汉子去，直到太府前小巷内一家人家。上至楼上，只见桌子上摆着些酒食，不见官人。恰待下楼，只见前日在岳庙里啰唣娘子的那后生出来道：‘娘子少坐，你丈夫来也。’锦儿慌慌下的楼时，只听得娘子在楼上叫‘杀人’。因此，我一地里寻官人不见，正撞着卖药的张先生道：‘我在樊楼前过，见教头和一个人入去吃酒。’因此特奔到这里。官人快去！”

林冲见说，吃了一惊，也不顾女使锦儿，三步做一步，跑到陆虞候家。抢到胡梯上，却关着楼门，只听得娘子叫道：“清平世界，如何把我良人妻子关在这里！”又听得高衙内道：“娘子，可怜见救俺！便是铁石人，也告的回转！”林冲立在胡梯上，叫道：“大嫂开门！”那妇人听的是丈夫声音，只顾来开门，高衙内吃了一惊，斡[9]开了楼窗，跳墙走了。林冲上的楼上，寻不见高衙内，问娘子道：“不曾被这厮点污了？”娘子道：“不曾。”林冲把陆虞候家打得粉碎，将娘子下楼。出得门外看时，邻舍两边都闭了门。女使锦儿接着，三个人一处归家去了。

林冲拿了一把解腕尖刀，径奔到樊楼前去寻陆虞候，也不见了。却回来他门前等了一晚，不见回家，林冲自归。娘子劝道：“我又不曾被他骗了，你休得胡做。”林冲道：“叵耐这陆谦畜生，我和你如兄若弟，你也来骗我！只怕不撞见高衙内，也照管着他头面。”娘子苦劝，那里肯放他出门。陆虞候只躲在太尉府内，亦不敢回家。林冲一连等了三日，并不见面。府前人见林冲面色不好，谁敢问他。

第四日饭时候，鲁智深径寻到林冲家相探，问道：“教头如何连日不见面？”林冲答道：“小弟少冗，不曾探得师兄。既蒙到我寒舍，本当草酌三杯，争奈一时不能周备，且和师兄一同上街闲玩一遭，市沽两盏，如何？”智深道：“最好。”两个同上街来，吃了一日酒，又约明日相会。自此，每日与智深上街吃酒，把这件事都放慢了。

且说高衙内自从那日在陆虞候家楼上吃了那惊，跳墙脱走，不敢对太尉说知，因此在府中卧病。陆虞候和富安两个来府里望衙内，见他容颜不好，精神憔悴，陆谦道：“衙内何故如此精神少乐？”衙内道：“实不瞒你们说，我为林冲老婆，两次不能勾得他，又吃他那一惊，这病越添得重了。眼见的半年三个月，性命难保。”二人道：“衙内且宽心，只在小人两个身上，好歹要共那妇人完聚，只除他自缢死了便罢。”正说间，府里老都管也来看衙内病症。只见：

不痒不疼，浑身上或寒或热；没撩没乱，满腹中又饱又饥。白昼忘餐，黄昏废寝。对爷娘怎诉心中恨，见相识难遮脸上羞。七魄悠悠，等候鬼门关上去；三魂荡荡，安排横死案中来。

那陆虞候和富安见老都管来问病，两个商量道：“只除恁的。”等候老都管看病已了出来，两个邀老都管僻静处说道：“若要衙内病好，只除教太尉得知，害了林冲性命，方能勾得他老婆和衙内在一处，这病便得好。若不如此，已定送了衙内性命。”老都管道：“这个容易，老汉今晚便禀太尉得知。”两个道：“我们已有了计，只等你回话。”

老都管至晚来见太尉，说道：“衙内不害别的症，却害林冲的老婆。”高俅道：“几时见了他的浑家？”都管禀道：“便是前月二十八日，在岳庙里见来，今经一月有馀。”又把陆虞候设的计备细说了。高俅道：“如此，因为他浑家怎地害他？我寻思起来，若为惜林冲一个人时，须送了我孩儿性命，却怎生是好？”都管道：“陆虞候和富安有计较[10]。”高俅道：“既是如此，教唤二人来商议。”老都管随即唤陆谦、富安，入到堂里，唱了喏。高俅问道：“我这小衙内的事，你两个有甚计较？救得我孩儿好了时，我自抬举你二人。”陆虞候向前禀道：“恩相在上，只除如此如此使得。”高俅见说了，喝采道：“好计！你两个明日便与我行。”不在话下。

再说林冲每日和智深吃酒，把这件事不记心了。那一日，两个同行到阅武坊巷口，见一条大汉，头戴一顶抓角儿头巾，穿一领旧战袍，手里拿着一口宝刀，插着个草标儿，立在街上，口里自言自语说道：“不遇识者，屈沉了我这口宝刀！”林冲也不理会，只顾和智深说着话走。那汉又跟在背后道：“好口宝刀，可惜不遇识者！”林冲只顾和智深走着，说得入港。那汉又在背后说道：“偌大一个东京，没一个识的军器的！”林冲听的说，回过头来，那汉飕的把那口刀掣将出来，明晃晃的夺人眼目。林冲合当有事，猛可地[11]道：“将来看！”那汉递将过来，林冲接在手内，同智深看了。但见：

清光夺目，冷气侵人。远看如玉沼春冰，近看似琼台瑞雪。花纹密布，鬼神见后心惊；气象纵横，奸党遇时胆裂。太阿巨阙应难比，干将莫邪亦等闲。

当时林冲看了，吃了一惊，失口道：“好刀！你要卖几钱？”那汉道：“索价三千贯，实价二千贯。”林冲道：“值是值二千贯，只没个识主。你若一千贯肯时，我买你的。”那汉道：“我急要些钱使，你若端的要时，饶你五百贯，实要一千五百贯。”林冲道：“只是一千贯，我便买了。”那汉叹口气道：“金子做生铁卖了。罢，罢！一文也不要少了我的。”林冲道：“跟我来家中，取钱还你。”回身却与智深道：“师兄且在茶房里少待，小弟便来。”智深道：“洒家且回去，明日再相见。”林冲别了智深，自引了卖刀的那汉，去家去取钱与他。将银子折算价贯，准还与他，就问那汉道：“你这口刀那里得来？”那汉道：“小人祖上留下。因为家道消乏，没奈何，将出来卖了。”林冲道：“你祖上是谁？”那汉道：“若说时，辱没杀人！”林冲再也不问。那汉得了银两自去了。林冲把这口刀翻来复去看了一回，喝采道：“端的好把刀！高太尉府中有一口宝刀，胡乱不肯教人看，我几番借看，也不肯将出来。今日我也买了这口好刀，慢慢和他比试。”林冲当晚不落手看了一晚，夜间挂在壁上，未等天明，又去看那刀。

次日巳牌时分，只听得门首有两个承局[12]叫道：“林教头，太尉钧旨，道你买一口好刀，就叫你将去比看。太尉在府里专等。”林冲听得，说道：“又是甚么多口的报知了。”两个承局催得林冲穿了衣服，拿了那口刀，随这两个承局来。一路上，林冲道：“我在府中不认的你。”两个人说道：“小人新近参随。”却早来到府前，进得到厅前，林冲立住了脚。两个又道：“太尉在里面后堂内坐地。”转入屏风，至后堂，又不见太尉，林冲又住了脚。两个又道：“太尉直在里面等你，叫引教头进来。”又过了两三重门，到一个去处，一周遭都是绿栏杆。两个又引林冲到堂前，说道：“教头，你只在此少待，等我入去禀太尉。”

林冲拿着刀，立在檐前，两个人自入去了。一盏茶时，不见出来。林冲心疑，探头入帘看时，只见檐前额上有四个青字，写道“白虎节堂”。林冲猛省道：“这节堂是商议军机大事处，如何敢无故辄入，不是礼！”急待回身，只听的靴履响、脚步鸣，一个人从外面入来，林冲看时，不是别人，却是本管高太尉。林冲见了，执刀向前声喏。太尉喝道：“林冲，你又无呼唤，安敢辄入白虎节堂！你知法度否？你手里拿着刀，莫非来刺杀下官？有人对我说，你两三日前拿刀在府前伺候，必有歹心。”林冲躬身禀道：“恩相，恰才蒙两个承局呼唤林冲，将刀来比看。”太尉喝道：“承局在那里？”林冲道：“恩相，他两个已投堂里去了。”太尉道：“胡说！甚么承局敢进我府堂里去。左右，与我拿下这厮！”说犹未了，旁边耳房里走出二十馀人，把林冲横推倒拽，恰似皂雕追紫燕，浑如猛虎啖羊羔。高太尉大怒道：“你既是禁军教头，法度也还不知道。因何手执利刃，故入节堂，欲杀本官？”叫左右把林冲推下，不知性命如何。

不因此等，有分教：大闹中原，纵横海内。直教农夫背上添心号[13]，渔父舟中插认旗[14]。毕竟看林冲性命如何，且听下回分解。

[1] 扣齿——迷信的传说：在向神祷告之前，要把上下牙齿不住地对击，这个祷告才有效。扣齿，就指的这个动作。

[2] 赤口、白舌——指由口舌招惹来的是非。

[3] 合口——斗嘴、吵架。

[4] 本官——指本部门的主管官员，即顶头上司。后文第八十一回“若得本官于天子前早晚题奏”的本官，却是该官、此官的意思。

[5] 请受——粮饷、薪俸。

[6] 没撩没乱——心绪不宁、老觉着有事搅扰的意思。

[7] 小闲——帮闲的人的自称，含有卑下的意思。

[8] 樊楼——宋时东京一座有名的酒楼。

[9] 斡（wò）——旋转。这里指推移。

[10] 计较——原意是斤斤较量。这里作计议、主意解释，有时也作盘算、考虑等解释。

[11] 猛可地——可，语助词；猛可地，犹如说猛然地。

[12] 承局——官府里的差役。

[13] 心号——军士的号衣，胸前背上都做上符号字样，那东西叫做心号。

[14] 认旗——就是认军旗。如本书中“风流双枪将”、“河北玉麒麟”之类的旗子。

CHAPTER 6. Lu Da Uproots a Willow Tree; Leopard’s Head Makes a Mistake in Entering the White Tiger Hall

NOW these vagabonds had two leaders; Zhang the Third, nicknamed “The Crossing Road Rat” and the other Li the Fourth, nicknamed “Green Grass Snake,” and they tried to induce Lu Da towards the cesspit, but he noticed that the crowd of men did not move at all. Lu Da invited them all to come into the temple, but as the two leaders had already knelt down they did not want to get up, and waited for him to come forward to assist them to get up when they would seize his legs. As they neither moved nor got up, Lu Da at once suspected some trickery, and thought they were surely waiting to “pull the tiger’s whiskers.” So he decided to go forward, and make them feel the weight of his fist and foot. As he strode up to them the leaders said, “We offer you our congratulations,” so saying, they advanced on their knees, and tried to grab hold of Lu Da’s legs. But the latter was too quick for them, and he kicked Green Grass Snake into the cesspit, and then did the same to Old Rat. This made the crowd of rascals speechless, and they all wanted to sneak off. Lu Da shouted that if any man attempted to go away he would be treated in the same way. No one dared move. In the cesspit the leaders were peeping to see what was happening. The cesspit was so deep that they could not touch the bottom. There was a terrible stench, and their heads were covered with maggots. They called out, “Reverend, please forgive us.”

“You rascals there,” shouted Lu Da, “come and help these men to get out. I forgive the whole lot of you.”

The two leaders were assisted out of the pit, and then they went and stood near a gourd stand some distance away as the stench was so strong.

Lu Da laughed, “You foolish fellows! You had better go to the pool and after a wash there I will talk with you.”

The leaders did this, and their followers handed them a change of clothing to put on.

Lu Da ordered them all to come into the temple, and there sitting in the center of the hall he pointed at the assembled men and said, “You gang of vagabonds need not try to deceive me. Now why did you come here to trifle with me?”

They all knelt down, and the leaders replied, “We live by gambling, and therefore have to depend on your garden for our food. The temple bribed us several times to leave the vegetables alone, but there is no result. Reverend, where do you come from? You are so strong that we must submit to you. We are willing to do whatever you wish.”

“I was a Major in the army,” replied Lu Da, “and because I killed many men I became a monk. My name is Lu Da. You thirty men are of no account to me for even if a thousand soldiers came here I would defeat them.”

The rascals expressed their appreciation of his clemency in letting them off so lightly; they then departed. The next day the rascals got together some money, ten jars of wine, and a roasted pig, and brought them to present to Lu Da. In the temple they took their seats in two rows with Lu Da in the center, and they all drank wine.

Lu Da asked why they had wasted so much money, and they replied, “We are happy because you are with us today, and we ask you to become our chief.”

Lu Da was pleased at this offer. When they had been drinking for some time, some were singing, others talking, applauding, or laughing. While in this state they heard a great noise outside, caused by some crows cawing. Some men showed their teeth to indicate dislike of this interruption and used a saying, “If there is trouble let it go to either heaven or hell.”

“What trouble are you fellows talking about?” asked Lu Da.

The men said, “We are afraid there will be trouble because of the cawing of those crows.”

“Where do you get that idea from?” asked Lu Da.

A servant laughed and replied, “The crows build their nests in a willow tree just outside the garden, and every evening they clamor there.”

Some said they would get a ladder, and destroy the nests. Lu Da was now merry with wine, and they all went outside to look at the nests. The Green Grass Snake said he would climb up the tree, but Lu Da took off his gown, and seizing the tree with both hands he made a mighty heave and uprooted the willow tree. The vagabonds were astounded, and kneeling down they worshiped him. They said, “Reverend, you are not a mortal man, but must be a living Buddha. If you had not the strength to lift ten million jin in weight you could not have done this.”

“That is only a small affair. Wait till tomorrow, when you can see me do some military exercises with my sword.”

It was evening before they all departed. The next day they were quite submissive in spirit due to what they had seen. They brought wine and meat for Lu Da, and watched him at his exercises. After they had done this for some time Lu Da decided to give them a banquet, and ordered his gardeners to go into the town and buy various kinds of fruit and wine, kill a pig and a sheep. At that time the weather was warm it being the end of the fourth lunar month, so Lu Da had mats spread under the ash tree, and there the vagabonds sat down. They were served with big bowls of wine, and large pieces of meat, and were told to eat as much as they wanted. During the feast they said, “Reverend, for several days we have seen you exercising, but we have not noticed you using your staff, and we should like to see you do that now.”

Lu Da agreed, and going indoors, brought out his monk staff, seventy inches in length, and weighed sixty-two jin. When they saw this huge weapon they were startled, and said, “If a man had not the strength of a buffalo in both arms he could not use that.” But Lu Da whirled it round with great ease, making it whistle in the air. On seeing this the men applauded.

Lu Da was quite in high spirit and did this display in good form. He noticed an official watching him through a break in the garden wall, so he ceased his exercises. The official wore blue gauze silk, folded in a knot on his head; round his head was a string of pearls to which were attached two white jade tablets at the back of his head; his military gown was of thin green silk decorated with a flower design; his belt was embroidered like the marks on the back of a tortoise; suspended from it were two otters’ tails, and it had a silver buckle; his black shoes were of court fashion with tips turned up; in his hand he held a fan made of Sichuan paper. His face was like a leopard’s, with big round eyes and a heavy beard. He was nine feet tall and seemed to be thirty-five years of age. He called out, “This is an extraordinary master, and uses his weapon well.”

The vagabonds answered, “As this Drill Instructor approves, Lu Da must be very good.”

“Who is that army officer?” asked Lu Da.

“He is the Drill Inspector of the Imperial Guards, and is named Lin Chong.”

“Why don’t you ask him to come inside?” asked Lu Da. But just then the onlooker jumped over the broken wall, and met Lu Da under the ash tree, where they sat down.

After the usual courtesies as to names, Lu Da said that he had met Lin Chong’s father at the Eastern Capital. Lin Chong was much pleased, and insisted upon making Lu Da his sworn elder brother. He then informed Lu Da that he had come with his wife to worship at the Yue Temple nearby. As he saw Lu Da exercising, so he told his maidservant, Jin Er, to go with his wife to the temple, and he would wait there for them. Lu Da ordered his servants to bring wine for the guest, and when the latter had partaken three cups, he saw the servant with a red face hurrying towards the broken wall and calling, “Master! come at once! Your wife has trouble with a man in the temple.”

Lin Chong quickly inquired where they were, and Jin Er replied, “She was just at the bottom of the Wu Yue Pavilion in the temple when a cheeky fellow stopped her, and would not let her go.”

Lin Chong hurriedly said to Lu Da, “Please excuse me, sir; I will come back very soon.” He ran towards the broken wall and jumping over, hastened to the Yue Temple followed by the maid. Upon reaching the Wu Yue Pavillion, he saw several men with bows, blowpipes, and sticks covered with lime for catching birds, standing inside the railings. On the staircase to the upper chamber was a young man, preventing his wife to proceed, and saying to her, “Come with me upstairs as I have something to say to you.”

Lin Chong’s wife blushingly replied, “How dare you speak to me in this way, in broad daylight?”

Lin Chong hurried forward, caught hold of the man, and pulled him away, saying; “You should be severely punished for molesting a respectable woman like this.” He was on the point of hitting him, when he recognized him as Master Gao, the adopted son of the Marshal of the Imperial Guard, Gao Qiu.

Now sometime before Gao Qiu having no child of his own, had adopted his cousin, and was very fond of him, but Master Gao used the influence of this official for the sole purpose of debauching the people’s wives. The people at the court were afraid of his power, and dared not oppose him; nevertheless, they nicknamed him “Heavenly King of Pleasure.”

When Lin Chong saw who it was, he became cautious. Master Gao saw that he was restraining himself, and not knowing that the woman was Lin Chong’s wife, asked, “Why do you interfere in my affair? You are going too far!”

Men standing round saw the danger of a row, and came forward saying, “Drill Instructor, please excuse him for if he had known that she was your wife he would not have intruded.”

But Lin Chong’s anger had not entirely subsided, and he glared at Master Gao, who left the temple and rode off.

Just then Lu Da arrived, armed with his monk staff, and accompanied by the vagabonds, and said he had come to fight for Lin Chong.

Lin Chong explained what had occurred, and said that he had let Master Gao off this time as he did not wish to annoy Gao Qiu. He referred to the old saying, “Fear not the authorities, except those that have authority over you.”

“You are afraid of the Marshal of the Imperial Guard,” said Lu Da, “but I am not. If I had met that young rascal I would have given him three hundred blows with my staff.”

Lin Chong saw that Lu Da was drunk so he said, “What you say is all right. These men persuaded me to let him off.”

“If you have any further trouble please tell me, and I will help you,” said Lu Da. They then all departed, but Lin Chong was rather troubled in his mind.

Master Gao was infatuated with the wife of Lin Chong, but had submitted to Lin Chong’s interference, and led his followers away, but as he returned to his official residence he was in low spirits. During the next few days his followers kept out of his way as they found him upset, and quite unable to attend to business. But one man, an idler named Fu An, nicknamed “Stinking Dickhead,” understood his master, and waited upon him. One day as Master Gao was sitting idly in the library he entered and remarked, “You are not looking well these last few days, and there must be something worrying you.”

“And don’t you know the reason?”

“I think I can guess what it is,” replied Fu An. “You are thinking of the wife of Lin Chong. Am I right?”

Master Gao laughed, “You have guessed correctly, but I have no means of getting her.”

“There is no difficulty. You are afraid of Lin Chong because he is a hero, and therefore you dare not belittle him. But never mind that, because he is in your employ, and he would not dare to offend your father, the Marshal of the Imperial Guard. If he made a slight mistake he could be banished, or if a serious error he would be ruined for life. I have a plan by which he could be implicated.”

Master Gao after hearing this said, “I have met many nice young women and girls, but I particularly love this one, and since I saw her, my mind has not been at peace. How could you implicate him? If applicable I will handsomely reward you.”

“I have an intimate friend Lu Qian who is very friendly with Lin Chong. Tomorrow you can hide yourself in Lu Qian’s house. He would arrange a feast, and invite Lin Chong to it. He however is to be told to lead Lin Chung to the Fan Inn for wine. Then I will go to Lin Chong’s home, and tell his wife that her husband, while drinking wine at Lu Qian’s house suddenly became ill and fell down unconscious. I will tell her that she had better go at once as it might be serious, and I will bring her to Lu Qian’s house. There when she sees you so well dressed, and listens to your flattery, she will become amenable to your suggestions as she is of an unstable disposition. What do you think of my plan?”

Master Gao was pleased, and said, “This evening I will send for Lu Qian.”

Now Lu Qian’s house was in the same alley as the house of the Marshal Gao Qiu of the Imperial Guard. The next day the plan was explained to Lu Qian who agreed to act his part. Although he was a friend of Lin Chong yet he would do this treacherous thing in order to ingratiate himself with the more influential Master Gao.

Lin Chong had been depressed in spirits for some time, and had not gone out of doors. But one day about ten o’clock in the morning he heard a man at the street door call out, “Is the Drill Instructor in?” Upon going to the door he saw Lu Qian and asked what he wanted.

“I have specially come to see you as I have not seen you for a long time.”

“I have been much depressed,” said Lin Chong, “and therefore have not been outside.”

“Come with me,” said Lu Qian, “and a few cups of wine will drive your cares away.”

Lin Chong invited him to come inside, and after a few cups of tea he told his wife that he was going with Lu Qian for some wine. She asked him not to drink too much, and to get back as soon as possible. The two men then left the house, and after strolling about for a little time Lu Qian suggested that instead of going to his home they would go to the Fan Inn for the wine. This was agreed to, and at the inn they sat in a small apartment where the waiter brought wine and fruit. While they were chatting Lin Chong sighed, and Lu Qian asked why he did that.

“You do not understand,” said Lin Chong, “that although I have ability I have not yet found an employer who appreciates my skill. I have to submit to the injustices and vile tempers of mean fellows.”

“Although there are several drill instructors yet there is not one equal to you in ability. The Marshal of the Imperial Guard treats you well so whose vile temper have you to submit to?”

Lin Chong then told of the affair he had with Master Gao some time ago, while Lu Qian pressed him to drink more wine. Lin Chong drank about nine cups of wine, left the room, and then the inn, for the lavatory. He was returning to the inn when he met his maidservant Jin Er who said that she had been looking for him. Upon Lin Chong asking why, she explained, “You had been gone with Lu Qian less than half an hour when a man rushed into your house, and spoke to your wife, ‘I am a neighbor of Lu Qian, and your husband is drinking with him. I saw your husband fall down senseless. You had better go there at once.’ Your wife asked our neighbor Madame Wang to look after the house, and then set off with me. We went to the alley where Marshal Gao Qiu lives, and opposite his gate we entered a house and went upstairs where there was a table set with food and wine, but you were not there. I was just about to go below when I saw the young man who had annoyed your wife at the Yue Temple the other day. He spoke to her, ‘Please sit down. Your husband will be here shortly.’ I hurried below, and there heard your wife upstairs shouting, ‘Help! Help!’ Therefore I ran to look for you, and happened to meet a man who told me that he had seen you entering the Fan Inn so I came here at once. Please, sir, hurry up!”

Lin Chong was astonished, and immediately rushed off to Lu Qian’s house. Upon arriving there, and going up the staircase he found that the door of the room was fastened, but heard his wife inside say, “In this day of universal tranquillity why do you detain me, an innocent woman, here?” To this Master Gao replied, “Madame, please take pity of me! Even a woman of iron or stone would change her mind.”

Lin Chong shouted, “Wife, open the door.” And she did so, while Master Gao being afraid, opened a window, jumped out, and ran away.

Lin Chong ascertained that his wife had not been ravished, and then smashed everything in the room. He took her downstairs, and on the streets noticed that the doors of the neighboring houses were closed. The maidservant just then joining them, they all three went home. There Lin Chong taking a dagger concealed it in his sleeve, and went to the Fan Inn to look for Lu Qian, but did not find him there. He then went to Lu Qian’s house, and waited outside the door until evening without seeing that man. Upon returning home Lin Chong was exhorted by his wife, “As I did not fall into that man’s trap you must be reasonable.”

“It is very intolerable to think that that brute Lu Qian who used to address me as his brother should have deceived me. Now I am only afraid that I shall not meet that Master Gao, and get my revenge.”

His wife strongly appealed to him not to go out.

Lu Qian hid in the private quarters of the Marshal of the Imperial Guard, as he dared not go home. Lin Chong waited for three days without seeing Lu Qian. On the fourth day Lu Da called on Lin Chong, and remarked that he had not seen him for several days. Lin Chong explained, “I have been somewhat busy these few days so that I have not been able to see you, but as you have favored me by visiting my little hut you should drink three cups of wine with me. Unfortunately I have no wine here so how will it be if we go for a stroll and call at some inn?”

Lu Da agreed and they went out. They were drinking wine for the whole day, and then agreed to meet again the following day. They even did this every day until at last the affair of Master Gao was almost obliterated from Lin Chong’s mind.

After escaping from Lu Qian’s house, Master Gao did not dare to mention the matter to his adopted father, and remained at home sick. Lu Qian and Fu An came to see him, and noticed that he still seemed to be depressed. Upon their asking why he was not well, he replied, “I will not deceive you in any way. It is because I have twice failed to get hold of that woman, and have been scared by her husband. My lovesickness is more acute than ever. I think I shall be like this for a long time, and that even my life is in danger.”

The two men said, “Master, do not worry! We will take this matter in hand, and will be responsible for bringing you and her together. She can only escape by committing suicide.”

While they were talking the steward came in to see how his master’s sickness was progressing. When he had made the usual inquiries Lu Qian and Fu An asked him to go with them for a private conversation. Upon reaching a quiet spot they said to him, “If you want Master Gao to recover you must report the affair to his father, Marshal Gao Qiu, and put an end to Lin Chong’s life. Then we can get hold of the woman and take her to Master Gao who will recover. If you do not do this your master will certainly die.”

“That is an easy thing,” replied the steward, “and I will inform Marshal Gao Qiu this very evening.”

“We have already the plan,” said the two men, “but we will wait until you tell us what’s Marshal Gao Qiu’s idea.”

The steward went to see the Marshal of the Imperial Guard that evening, and told him, “Your adopted son is melancholy because he cannot have the wife of Drill Instructor Lin Chong. He met her at the Yue Temple, more than a month ago, and ever since he has become lovesick.” He then explained Lu Qian’s plan for curing Master Gao.

Gao Qiu thought the matter over, but could not see how he could damage the prospects of Lin Chong, and said so. He agreed however to hear what plan Lu Qian had, and sent for him. Upon their arrival they called out “nuo!” in the usual way, and Gao Qiu asked what plan they had to cure his son. Lu Qian explained the plot, and the Marshal approved of it, and ordered them to carry it out the next day.

Lin Chong had been drinking with Lu Da every day so that he had quite forgotten about the affair of Master Gao. It happened, however, on one day as they were walking near Yue Wu Fang lane they saw a big man with a splendid sword on which was a tuft of grass to indicate that it was for sale. He called out, “I have not yet met a man who knows the value of this sword.” But Lin Chong and Lu Da paid no attention, and strolled along. The man followed them calling out, “A good sword! What a pity that nobody knows its value!” The two friends still paid no attention so the man called out as they entered an alley, “This capital is a very big place, and yet there is no one who knows about military weapons.”

Lin Chong could not help but hear this, and turned round. The man drew the sword out of its scabbard, and displayed its dazzling brightness. Lin Chong was not aware that this sword would doom his fate as he asked to look at it. The man handed it over for inspection, and Lin Chong exclaimed, “What a fine sword! How much do you want for it?”

The man said it was worth three thousand strings of cash, but he would take two thousand.

“It is worth two thousand,” said Lin Chong, “but nobody here knows its value. If you will take one thousand I will buy it.”

“I am hard up for ready money,” said the man, “and as you want it I will make a reduction of five hundred.”

But Lin Chong would offer only one thousand so the man heaved a sigh; saying, “Now gold is for sale at the price of scrap iron. But enough! But don’t give me a single cash less.”

Lin Chong said he would pay him at his home, and so departed with Lu Da, promising to see him again the following day. He duly paid for the sword, and then asked where he got it from.

“It is a family heirloom, and I sell it because we are very hard up,” replied the man.

“Who was your ancestor?”

“If I told you I should be ashamed.”

Lin Chong did not press the point, and the man departed. He examined the sword, turning it this way and that, and saying to himself, “This is certainly an excellent sword. Marshal Gao Qiu of the Imperial Guard, has a sword like this, but he does not let anybody see it. I have asked him several times to let me see it, but have been refused. By and by I will take this sword and compare it with his.” He continued examining the sword till it was evening. At night he hung it on the wall, but got up long before daybreak to have another look at it.

The following day he heard two minor officials at the door calling out, “Drill Instructor Lin Chong, Marshal Gao Qiu of the Imperial Guard has heard that you have bought a sword, and he orders you to bring it for his inspection. He is specially waiting for you in his yamen.” Upon hearing this Lin Chong wondered who could have reported the purchase to the Marshal. The two men waited until he was dressed, then he took the sword and went with them.

On the way he said, “I have not seen you at the headquarters.”

“We have been appointed quite recently,” they replied.

Upon reaching the headquarters they entered while Lin Chong remained in the courtyard. The two men then came back and said that the Marshal was in the hall at the back. Upon going there they passed round the screen before the door of the hall and then saw that the Marshal was not inside. Lin Chong stopped there but the men said that the Marshal had instructed them to take him inside. So he went with them through three doors, until they came to a building surrounded by green railings. There they asked him to wait while they were going to announce his arrival. They went inside and Lin Chong stood under the eaves of the hall for so long a time that it would take to drink a cup of tea, but the men still had not returned. Such a delay and silence made him suspicious. He lifted up the door curtain and peeping inside saw an honorary tablet with four black characters, “White Tiger’s Private Hall.” He understood immediately that this was the hall where councils of war were held, and that he was trespassing. He quickly turned round to go away, but just then he heard the sound of footsteps behind him, and looking back saw the Marshal himself. He stepped forward, and called out, “nuo” (awaiting your attention).

Marshal Gao Qiu shouted, “Lin Chong! How dare you enter the White Tiger’s Private Hall, seeing that I have not summoned you? Moreover you have a sword in your hand, and evidently intended to kill me. I have heard that you have been hanging about these headquarters for several days with a sword so you evidently have bad intentions.”

Lin Chong bowed his head, and said, “Your Benevolent Excellency! I was favored by a visit of two junior officers who told me to bring my sword here to compare it with yours.”

Marshal Gao Qiu shouted, “Where are those junior officers?”

“Your Benevolent Excellency, they went inside this hall.”

“Nonsense! No junior officer dare enter my rooms! Seize this person!”

Before he had finished saying this, about thirty men rushed out of the building on both sides, and arrested him. Marshal Gao Qiu pretended to be angry, and said, “You are a Drill Instructor, and yet you do not know the law. Why do you enter the White Tiger’s Private Hall with a sword in your hand, and try to kill me?”

This event was to lead to much trouble in the empire.

Marks inscribed on farmer’s backs;

Fishing boats studded with flags.

We will now see what happened to Lin Chong.