第八十九回

第八十九回 人亡物在公子填词 蛇影杯弓颦卿绝粒

却说凤姐正自起来纳闷，忽听见小丫头这话，又唬了一跳，连忙问道：“什么官事？”小丫头道：“也不知道。刚才二门上小厮回进来，回老爷有要紧的官事，所以太太叫我请二爷来了。”凤姐听是工部里的事，才把心略略的放下，因说道：“你回去回太太，就说二爷昨日晚上出城有事，没有回来。打发人先回珍大爷去罢。”那丫头答应着去了。

一时贾珍过来见了部里的人，问明了，进来见了王夫人，回道：“部中来报，昨日总河[2]奏到河南一带决了河口，湮没了几府州县。又要开销国帑〔一〕，修理城工。工部司官又有一番照料，所以部里特来报知老爷的。”说完退出，及贾政回家来回明。从此直到冬间，贾政天天有事，常在衙门里。宝玉的工课也渐渐松了，只是怕贾政觉察出来，不敢不常在学房里去念书，连黛玉处也不敢常去。

那时已到十月中旬，宝玉起来要往学房中去。这日天气陡寒〔二〕，只见袭人早已打点出一包衣服，向宝玉道：“今日天气很冷，早晚宁使暖些。”说着，把衣服拿出来给宝玉挑了一件穿。又包了一件，叫小丫头拿出交给焙茗，嘱咐道：“天气凉，二爷要换时，好生预备着。”焙茗答应了，抱着毡包，跟着宝玉自去。宝玉到了学房中，做了自己的工课，忽听得纸窗呼喇喇一派风声。代儒道：“天气又发冷。”把风门推开一看，只见西北上一层层的黑云渐渐往东南扑上来。焙茗走进来回宝玉道：“二爷，天气冷了，再添些衣服罢。”宝玉点点头儿。只见焙茗拿进一件衣服来，宝玉不看则已，看了时神已痴了。那些小学生都巴着眼瞧，却原是晴雯所补的那件雀金裘。宝玉道：“怎么拿这一件来！是谁给你的？”焙茗道：“是里头姑娘们包出来的。”宝玉道：“我身上不大冷，且不穿呢，包上罢。”代儒只当宝玉可惜这件衣服，却也心里喜他知道俭省。焙茗道：“二爷穿上罢，着了凉，又是奴才的不是了。二爷只当疼奴才罢。”宝玉无奈，只得穿上，呆呆的对着书坐着。代儒也只当他看书，不甚理会。晚间放学时，宝玉便往代儒托病告假一天。代儒本来上年纪的人，也不过伴着几个孩子解闷儿，时常也八病九痛的，乐得去一个少操一日心。况且明知贾政事忙，贾母溺爱，便点点头儿。

宝玉一径回来，见过贾母王夫人，也是这样说，自然没有不信的，略坐一坐便回园中去了。见了袭人等，也不似往日有说有笑的，便和衣躺在炕上。袭人道：“晚饭预备下了，这会儿吃还是等一等儿？”宝玉道：“我不吃了，心里不舒服。你们吃去罢。”袭人道：“那么着你也该把这件衣服换下来了，那个东西那里禁得住揉搓。”宝玉道：“不用换。”袭人道：“倒也不但是娇嫩物儿，你瞧瞧那上头的针线也不该这么糟踏他呀。”宝玉听了这话，正碰在他心坎儿上，叹了一口气道：“那么着，你就收起来给我包好了，我也总不穿他了。”说着，站起来脱下。袭人才过来接时，宝玉已经自己叠起。袭人道：“二爷怎么今日这样勤谨起来了？”宝玉也不答言，叠好了，便问：“包这个的包袱呢？”麝月连忙递过来，让他自己包好，回头却和袭人挤着眼儿笑。宝玉也不理会，自己坐着，无精打彩，猛听架上钟响，自己低头看了看表，针已指到酉初二刻了。一时小丫头点上灯来。袭人道：“你不吃饭，喝一口粥儿罢。别净饿着，看仔细饿上虚火来，那又是我们的累赘了。”宝玉摇摇头儿，说：“不大饿，强吃了倒不受用。”袭人道：“既这么着，就索性早些歇着罢。”于是袭人麝月铺设好了，宝玉也就歇下，翻来复去只睡不着，将及黎明，反朦胧睡去，不一顿饭时，早又醒了。

此时袭人麝月也都起来。袭人道：“昨夜听着你翻腾到五更多，我也不敢问你。后来我就睡着了，不知到底你睡着了没有？”宝玉道：“也睡了一睡，不知怎么就醒了。”袭人道：“你没有什么不受用？”宝玉道：“没有，只是心上发烦。”袭人道：“今日学房里去不去？”宝玉道：“我昨儿已经告了一天假了，今儿我要想园里逛一天，散散心，只是怕冷。你叫他们收拾一间房子，备下一炉香，搁下纸墨笔砚。你们只管干你们的，我自己静坐半天才好。别叫他们来搅我。”麝月接着道：“二爷要静静儿的用工夫，谁敢来搅。”袭人道：“这么着很好，也省得着了凉。自己坐坐，心神也不散。”因又问：“你既懒待吃饭，今日吃什么？早说好传给厨房里去。”宝玉道：“还是随便罢，不必闹的大惊小怪的。倒是要几个果子搁在那屋里，借点果子香。”袭人道：“那个屋里好？别的都不大干净，只有晴雯起先住的那一间，因一向无人，还干净，就是清冷些。”宝玉道：“不妨，把火盆挪过去就是了。”袭人答应了。正说着，只见一个小丫头端了一个茶盘儿，一个碗，一双牙箸，递给麝月道：“这是刚才花姑娘要的，厨房里老婆子送了来了。”麝月接了一看，却是一碗燕窝汤，便问袭人道：“这是姐姐要的么？”袭人笑道：“昨夜二爷没吃饭，又翻腾了一夜，想来今日早起心里必是发空的，所以我告诉小丫头们叫厨房里作了这个来的。”袭人一面叫小丫头放桌儿，麝月打发宝玉喝了，漱了口。只见秋纹走来说道：“那屋里已经收拾妥了，但等着一时炭劲过了，二爷再进去罢。”宝玉点头，只是一腔心事，懒怠说话。一时小丫头来请，说笔砚都安放妥当了。宝玉道：“知道了。”又一个小丫头回道：“早饭得了。二爷在那里吃？”宝玉道：“就拿了来罢，不必累赘了。”小丫头答应了自去。一时端上饭来，宝玉笑了一笑，向袭人麝月道：“我心里闷得很，自己吃只怕又吃不下去，不如你们两个同我一块儿吃，或者吃的香甜，我也多吃些。”麝月笑道：“这是二爷的高兴，我们可不敢。”袭人道：“其实也使得，我们一处喝酒，也不止今日。只是偶然替你解闷儿还使得，若认真这样，还有什么规矩体统呢。”说着三人坐下。宝玉在上首，袭人麝月两个打横陪着。吃了饭，小丫头端上漱口茶，两个看着撤了下去。宝玉因端着茶，默默如有所思，又坐了一坐，便问道：“那屋里收拾妥了么？”麝月道：“头里就回过了，这回子又问。”

宝玉略坐了一坐，便过这间屋子来，亲自点了一炷香，摆上些果品，便叫人出去，关上了门。外面袭人等都静悄无声。宝玉拿了一幅泥金角花的粉红笺出来，口中祝了几句，便提起笔来写道：

怡红主人焚付晴姐知之，酌茗清香，庶几来飨。

其词云：

随身伴，独自意绸缪[5]。谁料风波平地起，顿教躯命即时休。孰与话轻柔？ 东逝水，无复向西流。想象更无怀梦草[6]，添衣还见翠云裘。脉脉使人愁！

写毕，就在香上点个火焚化了。静静儿等着，直待一炷香点尽了，才开门出来。袭人道：“怎么出来了？想来又闷的慌了。”

宝玉笑了一笑，假说道：“我原是心里烦，才找个地方儿静坐坐儿。这会子好了，还要外头走走去呢。”说着，一径出来，到了潇湘馆中，在院里问道：“林妹妹在家里呢么？”紫鹃接应道：“是谁？”掀帘看时，笑道：“原来是宝二爷。姑娘在屋里呢，请二爷到屋里坐着。”宝玉同着紫鹃走进来。黛玉却在里间呢，说道：“紫鹃，请二爷屋里坐罢。”宝玉走到里间门口，看见新写的一副紫墨色泥金云龙笺的小对，上写着：“绿窗明月在，青史古人空。”宝玉看了，笑了一笑，走入门去，笑问道：“妹妹做什么呢？”黛玉站起来迎了两步，笑着让道：“请坐。我在这里写经，只剩得两行了，等写完了再说话儿。”因叫雪雁倒茶。宝玉道：“你别动，只管写。”说着，一面看见中间挂着一幅单条[7]，上面画着一个嫦娥，带着一个侍者；又一个女仙，也有一个侍者，捧着一个长长儿的衣囊似的，二人身边略有些云护，别无点缀，全仿李龙眠[8]白描笔意，上有“斗寒图”三字，用八分书[9]写着。宝玉道：“妹妹这幅《斗寒图》可是新挂上的？”黛玉道：“可不是。昨日他们收拾屋子，我想起来，拿出来叫他们挂上的。”宝玉道：“是什么出处？”黛玉笑道：“眼前熟的很的，还要问人。”宝玉笑道：“我一时想不起，妹妹告诉我罢。”黛玉道：“岂不闻‘青女素娥俱耐冷，月中霜里斗婵娟’[10]。”宝玉道：“是啊。这个实在新奇雅致，却好此时拿出来挂。”说着，又东瞧瞧，西走走。

雪雁沏了茶来，宝玉吃着。又等了一会子，黛玉经才写完，站起来道：“简慢了。”宝玉笑道：“妹妹还是这么客气。”但见黛玉身上穿着月白绣花小毛皮袄，加上银鼠坎肩；头上挽着随常云髻，簪上一枝赤金匾簪，别无花朵；腰下系着杨妃色[11]绣花绵裙。真比如：

亭亭玉树临风立，冉冉香莲带露开。

宝玉因问道：“妹妹这两日弹琴来着没有？”黛玉道：“两日没弹了。因为写字已经觉得手冷，那里还去弹琴。”宝玉道：“不弹也罢了。我想琴虽是清高之品，却不是好东西，从没有弹琴里弹出富贵寿考来的，只有弹出忧思怨乱来的。再者弹琴也得心里记谱，未免费心。依我说，妹妹身子又单弱，不操这心也罢了。”黛玉抿着嘴儿笑。宝玉指着壁上道：“这张琴可就是么？怎么这么短？”黛玉笑道：“这张琴不是短，因我小时学抚的时候别的琴都够不着，因此特地做起来的。虽不是焦尾枯桐[12]，这鹤山凤尾还配得齐整，龙池雁足[13]高下还相宜。你看这断纹不是牛旄[14]似的么，所以音韵也还清越。”宝玉道：“妹妹这几天来做诗没有？”黛玉道：“自结社以后没大作。”宝玉笑道：“你别瞒我，我听见你吟的什么‘不可惙，素心如何天上月’，你搁在琴里觉得音响分外的响亮。有的没有？”黛玉道：“你怎么听见了？”宝玉道：“我那一天从蓼风轩来听见的，又恐怕打断你的清韵，所以静听了一会就走了。我正要问你：前路是平韵，到末了儿忽转了仄韵，是个什么意思？”黛玉道：“这是人心自然之音，做到那里就到那里，原没有一定的。”宝玉道：“原来如此。可惜我不知音，枉听了一会子。”黛玉道：“古来知音人能有几个？”宝玉听了，又觉得出言冒失了，又怕寒了黛玉的心，坐了一坐，心里像有许多话，却再无可讲的。黛玉因方才的话也是冲口而出，此时回想，觉得太冷淡些，也就无话。宝玉一发打量黛玉设疑，遂讪讪的站起来说道：“妹妹坐着罢。我还要到三妹妹那里瞧瞧去呢。”黛玉道：“你若是见了三妹妹，替我问候一声罢。”宝玉答应着便出来了。

黛玉送至屋门口，自己回来闷闷的坐着，心里想道：“宝玉近来说话半吐半吞，忽冷忽热，也不知他是什么意思。”正想着，紫鹃走来道：“姑娘，经不写了？我把笔砚都收好了？”黛玉道：“不写了，收起去罢。”说着，自己走到里间屋里床上歪着，慢慢的细想。紫鹃进来问道：“姑娘喝碗茶罢？”黛玉道：“不喝呢。我略歪歪儿，你们自己去罢。”

紫鹃答应着出来，只见雪雁一个人在那里发呆。紫鹃走到他跟前问道：“你这会子也有了什么心事了么？”雪雁只顾发呆，倒被他唬了一跳，因说道：“你别嚷，今日我听见了一句话，我告诉你听，奇不奇。你可别言语。”说着，往屋里努嘴儿。因自己先行，点着头儿叫紫鹃同他出来，到门外平台底下，悄悄儿的道：“姐姐你听见了么？宝玉定了亲了！”紫鹃听见，唬了一跳，说道：“这是那里来的话？只怕不真罢。”雪雁道：“怎么不真，别人大概都知道，就只咱们没听见。”紫鹃道：“你是那里听来的？”雪雁道：“我听见侍书说的，是个什么知府家，家资也好，人才也好。”紫鹃正听时，只听得黛玉咳嗽了一声，似乎起来的光景。紫鹃恐怕他出来听见，便拉了雪雁摇摇手儿，往里望望，不见动静，才又悄悄儿的问道：“他到底怎么说来？”雪雁道：“前儿不是叫我到三姑娘那里去道谢吗，三姑娘不在屋里，只有侍书在那里。大家坐着，无意中说起宝二爷的淘气来，他说宝二爷怎么好，只会顽儿，全不像大人的样子，已经说亲了，还是这么呆头呆脑。我问他定了没有，他说是定了，是个什么王大爷做媒的。那王大爷是东府里的亲戚，所以也不用打听，一说就成了。”紫鹃侧着头想了一想，“这句话奇！”又问道：“怎么家里没有人说起？”雪雁道：“侍书也说的是老太太的意思。若一说起，恐怕宝玉野了心，所以都不提起。侍书告诉了我，又叮嘱千万不可露风，说出来只道是我多嘴。”把手往里一指，“所以他面前也不提。今日是你问起，我不犯瞒你。”

正说到这里，只听鹦鹉叫唤，学着说：“姑娘回来了，快倒茶来！”倒把紫鹃雪雁吓了一跳，回头并不见有人，便骂了鹦鹉一声，走进屋内。只见黛玉喘吁吁的刚坐在椅子上，紫鹃搭讪着问茶问水。黛玉问道：“你们两个那里去了？再叫不出一个人来。”说着便走到炕边，将身子一歪，仍旧倒在炕上，往里躺下，叫把帐子撩下。紫鹃雪雁答应出去。他两个心里疑惑方才的话只怕被他听了去了，只好大家不提。谁知黛玉一腔心事，又窃听了紫鹃雪雁的话，虽不很明白，已听得了七八分，如同将身撂在大海里一般。思前想后，竟应了前日梦中之谶，千愁万恨，堆上心来。左右打算，不如早些死了，免得眼见了意外的事情，那时反倒无趣。又想到自己没了爹娘的苦，自今以后，把身子一天一天的糟踏起来，一年半载，少不得身登清净。打定了主意，被也不盖，衣也不添，竟是合眼装睡。紫鹃和雪雁来伺候几次，不见动静，又不好叫唤。晚饭都不吃。点灯已后，紫鹃掀开帐子，见已睡著了，被窝都蹬在脚后。怕他着了凉，轻轻儿拿来盖上。黛玉也不动，单待他出去，仍然褪下。那紫鹃只管问雪雁：“今儿的话到底是真的是假的？”雪雁道：“怎么不真。”紫鹃道：“侍书怎么知道的？”雪雁道：“是小红那里听来的。”紫鹃道：“头里咱们说话，只怕姑娘听见了，你看刚才的神情，大有原故。今日以后，咱们倒别提这件事了。”说着，两个人也收拾要睡。紫鹃进来看时，只见黛玉被窝又蹬下来，复又给他轻轻盖上。一宿晚景不提。

次日，黛玉清早起来，也不叫人，独自一个呆呆的坐着。紫鹃醒来，看见黛玉已起，便惊问道：“姑娘怎么这样早？”黛玉道：“可不是，睡得早，所以醒得早。”紫鹃连忙起来，叫醒雪雁，伺候梳洗。那黛玉对着镜子，只管呆呆的自看。看了一回，那泪珠儿断断连连，早已湿透了罗帕。正是：

瘦影正临春水照，卿须怜我我怜卿。

紫鹃在旁也不敢劝，只怕倒把闲话勾引旧恨来。迟了好一会，黛玉才随便梳洗了，那眼中泪渍终是不干。又自坐了一会，叫紫鹃道：“你把藏香点上。”紫鹃道：“姑娘，你睡也没睡得几时，如何点香？不是要写经？”黛玉点点头儿。紫鹃道：“姑娘今日醒得太早，这会子又写经，只怕太劳神了罢。”黛玉道：“不怕，早完了早好。况且我也并不是为经，倒借着写字解解闷儿。以后你们见了我的字迹，就算见了我的面儿了。”说着，那泪直流下来。紫鹃听了这话，不但不能再劝，连自己也掌不住滴下泪来。

原来黛玉立定主意，自此已后，有意糟踏身子，茶饭无心，每日渐减下来。宝玉下学时，也常抽空问候，只是黛玉虽有万千言语，自知年纪已大，又不便似小时可以柔情挑逗，所以满腔心事，只是说不出来。宝玉欲将实言安慰，又恐黛玉生嗔，反添病症。两个人见了面，只得用浮言劝慰，真真是亲极反疏了。那黛玉虽有贾母王夫人等怜恤，不过请医调治，只说黛玉常病，那里知他的心病。紫鹃等虽知其意，也不敢说。从此一天一天的减，到半月之后，肠胃日薄，一日果然粥都不能吃了。黛玉日间听见的话，都似宝玉娶亲的话，看见怡红院中的人，无论上下，也像宝玉娶亲的光景。薛姨妈来看，黛玉不见宝钗，越发起疑心，索性不要人来看望，也不肯吃药，只要速死。睡梦之中，常听见有人叫宝二奶奶的。一片疑心，竟成蛇影。一日竟是绝粒，粥也不喝，恹恹一息，垂毙殆尽。未知黛玉性命如何，且看下回分解。

[1] 蛇影杯弓——即“杯弓蛇影”。《晋书·乐广传》载：晋代乐广宴客，客饮酒，见杯中有蛇，归而得疾。乐广知道实为壁上之弓映于杯中的倒影，再邀客饮，客恍然大悟，疾遂愈。一说为杜宣事。见《风俗通》。后用以喻疑神疑鬼。

[2] 总河——亦称“河督”，河道总督的简称。元代曰总治河防使，明代曰总督河道都御使，清代称河道总督，正二品，总管黄、淮等河道事务。

〔一〕 “开销国帑”，“销”原作“锁”，从藤本改。

〔二〕 “这日天气陡寒”，“这日”原作“起来”，从程乙本改。

[5] 绸缪（móu谋）——这里是心意缠绵之意。

[6] 怀梦草——传说汉武帝的宠妃李夫人死，帝极怀念，东方朔献仙草一株，夜间佩之，梦会李夫人，因称之为怀梦草。见《洞冥记》。

[7] 单条——即立轴，中国画装裱体式之一，直幅卷轴的一种，居中为画幅，四周镶边成狭长形条幅，有别于“中堂”和“吊屏”，如对联等。

[8] 李龙眠——宋代画家。名公麟，字伯时，安徽人，晚年居龙眠山庄，号龙眠山人。擅人物鞍马、神仙佛道，兼及山水花鸟。作画多用“白描”，《画断》赞其笔法如“云行水流”。

[9] 八分书——字体名，汉隶的别称。魏晋时也称楷书为隶书，故别称有波挑的隶书为“八分”，以示区别。关于“八分”的解释，一般取张怀瓘之说：“若‘八’字分散……名之为八分。”《太平广记》：“按八分者，秦时人上谷王次仲所作也。”一说为东汉蔡邕所创。

[10] “青女”两句——李商隐《霜月》中诗句。青女：主霜雪的女神；素娥：即嫦娥。

[11] 杨妃色——即粉红色。

[12] 焦尾枯桐——《后汉书·蔡邕传》载：某人用枯桐树烧饭，蔡邕听其火裂声，知为美材，取来做琴，果然极佳，因其尾已焦，名为焦琴或焦尾琴。后以“焦尾枯桐”称赞好琴。

[13] 鹤山凤尾、龙池雁足——均为古琴几个部位的专名。鹤山：即岳山，又名临乐、琴鹤，琴面近琴首一端的高起者，上架七弦。凤尾：即琴尾。龙池：琴底前端的一长方孔。琴底尾端一较小长方孔叫凤沼。雁足：琴腰底部的两只木足。

[14] 牛旄——古琴上髹漆的裂纹叫断纹，断纹如“牛旄”者为上品。

CHAPTER 89. Our hero sees the handiwork of a departed love, and is moved to write an ode Frowner falls prey to hysterical fear and resolves to starve to death

We have seen in the last chapter how Xi-feng forced herself to get up, and was sitting brooding in her apartment, when suddenly a maid arrived with news of some fresh crisis.

‘What has happened?’ she asked in alarm.

‘I don’t know, ma’am,’ replied the maid. ‘A messenger has come from the Ministry for the Master. One of the pages on the inner gate reported to Her Ladyship, and Her Ladyship sent me here to ask for Mr Lian.’

Xi-feng became slightly calmer when she realized that it was only a Ministry affair.

‘Will you tell Her Ladyship,’ she said, ‘that Mr Lian was away last night on business and has not yet returned. She had better send round for Mr Zhen at the other mansion.’

‘Yes ma’am.’ The maid departed.

Presently Cousin Zhen came over to Rong-guo House to receive the messenger from the Ministry. Having ascertained the facts, he went in to report to Lady Wang.

‘The messenger says that yesterday the President of the Yellow River Conservancy Board presented a memorial, describing the bursting of dykes throughout Honan Province and the flooding of several prefectures, departments and districts. They are allocating funds for reconstruction of city walls. This is going to mean a lot of extra administrative work for the senior officials at the Ministry, and they wished to inform Sir Zheng at once.’

Having said this, Cousin Zhen withdrew. Jia Zheng was informed directly upon his return, and for most of the winter he was kept very busy and spent nearly all of his time at the Ministry. Although for Bao-yu this meant a period of less intensive studying, fear of being detected by his father still caused him to keep up his attendance at school, and inhibited him from spending much time with Dai-yu.

One morning in the middle of the tenth month, Bao-yu rose and prepared to set off as usual for school. The weather had suddenly turned chilly, and he saw Aroma come in with a bundle of winter clothes.

‘It’s very cold today,’ she said. ‘You’ll need to wrap up well.’

She chose a garment for him to wear and wrapped up another, which she entrusted to one of the younger maids. The maid went out and gave it to Tealeaf, saying:

‘As it’s so cold today, you are to have this ready in case Master Bao wants to change.’

Tealeaf acknowledged these instructions, and followed Bao-yu to school with the felt-wrapped bundle in his arms.

On arrival, Bao-yu sat down to work. He was soon distracted from his books by the sound of the paper casements vibrating in the wind.

‘The weather seems to have taken a turn for the worse,’ observed the Preceptor, opening a touch-hole in one of the windows and looking out. A great bank of dark clouds in the north-west was surging steadily across the sky. Tealeaf came into the classroom.

‘It’s getting colder, Master Bao. You had better put something warmer on.’

Bao-yu nodded, and Tealeaf walked across the room. The sight of the garment he was carrying had a most curious effect on Bao-yu, who gazed at it as if in a trance. The other boys watched with fascination.

‘Why did you have to bring this?’ asked Bao-yu. ‘Who gave it to you?’

He had recognized it at once as the Peacock Gold snow-cape, the one that Skybright had so bravely mended for him during her last illness.

‘The maids wrapped it up and told me to bring it,’ replied Tealeaf.

‘Well, I’m not feeling particularly cold,’ said Bao-yu. ‘I don’t think I’ll wear it just now. You may as well wrap it up again.’

The Preceptor supposed that Bao-yu was reluctant to spoil so fine a garment, and noted with gratification this evidence of thrift.

‘Please put it on, Master Bao!’ pleaded Tealeaf. ‘For my sake! You know I’ll get the blame if you catch a cold.’

With extreme reluctance Bao-yu put it on, sat down again and stared glumly at his books. The Preceptor presumed that he was concentrating once more on his studies and gave the incident no further thought.

That afternoon, when the day’s lessons were over, Bao-yu said that he felt unwell and asked to be excused from school the next day. Dai-ru had, of late, come to view his students in a more lenient light, more as companions with whom to while away his old age. His own health was poor, and he was glad to lessen his burden of work by the judicious dispensation of sick-leave. Besides, he knew that Sir Zheng had more important matters on his mind, and that Grandmother Jia always indulged her favourite grandson. With a nod he indicated to Bao-yu that his request was granted.

Bao-yu went straight home. After calling briefly on his mother and grandmother, neither of whom questioned his plea of illness, he returned to the Garden. He was not at all his usual smiling talkative self, in fact he hardly said a word to Aroma and the others, but lay down dressed as he was on the kang.

‘Dinner’s ready,’ said Aroma. ‘Do you want it now, or will you wait till later?’

Bao-yu: ‘I won’t have anything to eat. I’m not feeling well. You just have yours.’

Aroma: ‘Well, you might at least take off that lovely cape. You’ll crumple it and ruin it.’

Bao-yu: ‘I want to keep it on.’

Aroma: ‘It’s not just the cape that I’m worried about. Look how carefully it’s been darned. You’ll spoil the stitching.’

This touched Bao-yu to the quick. He heaved a deep sigh.

‘Oh all right! Put it away then. Wrap it up carefully. I shall never wear it again.’

He stood up to take it off. Aroma came over to take it from him, but he had already begun to fold it himself.

‘Why are you being so industrious today?’ she asked in surprise.

He made no reply but went on folding.

‘Where’s the wrapper?’ he asked when he had finished.

Musk handed it to him, and as he carefully wrapped the cape, she turned to give Aroma a wink. Bao-yu took no notice of them but sat down, looking thoroughly dejected. The clock on the shelf chimed, and he glanced down at his watch. It was already half-past five. Shortly afterwards a junior maid came in to light the lamps.

‘If you won’t have a proper meal, at least have a little hot congee,’ pleaded Aroma. ‘If you go to bed on an empty stomach you could easily catch a fever. And then think of all the trouble we’ll have.’

He shook his head.

‘I’m not hungry. I’d only feel worse if I tried to force something down.’

‘Well in that case,’ said Aroma, ‘you should at least have an early night.’

She and Musk made his bed and Bao-yu lay down. He tossed and turned, but found it quite impossible to get to sleep. Finally, just before dawn, he dozed off, only to awake again half an hour later. Aroma and Musk were already up and about.

‘I heard you tossing and turning till the early hours,’ said Aroma. ‘I didn’t dare disturb you. Then I fell asleep myself. Did you manage to sleep in the end?’

‘A bit. But I woke up again almost at once.’

‘Have you got a pain anywhere?’

‘No. I just feel depressed.’

‘Will you be going to school today?’

‘No. I asked for the day off yesterday. I thought I might go for a walk in the Garden to try and throw off this depression. But I think it will be too cold. Will you tell them to clear a room for me and put an incense burner and my writing things in it? I won’t need you today. I just want to sit quietly on my own for a while. Tell the others I don’t want to be disturbed.’

‘Of course no one will disturb you if you want to study quietly,’ said Musk as soon as she heard this.

‘I think it’s an excellent idea,’ said Aroma. ‘You will be able to keep warm, and a day of studying on your own will help you to feel more settled.’ She added: ‘But please, if you don’t feel like eating a proper meal, have something. What would you like? Tell me now, and I can get them to prepare it in the kitchen.’

‘Whatever’s easiest,’ replied Bao-yu. ‘Don’t go to a lot of fuss. It would be nice to have some fruit in the room, for the scent.’

‘Which room would you prefer?’ asked Aroma. ‘They are all rather cluttered, except Skybright’s old room, which has been empty for quite a while. That might be a bit cold and lonely though.’

‘That doesn’t matter,’ said Bao-yu. ‘Have the charcoal brazier moved in there.’

Aroma gave instructions for this to be done, and as she was speaking a maid came in carrying a tray with a bowl and a pair of ivory chopsticks, which she handed to Musk, saying:

‘Here’s the soup Miss Hua ordered from the kitchen.’

Musk took the tray and saw that the bowl contained Bird’s Nest Soup.

‘Is this what you ordered?’ she asked Aroma.

‘Yes,’ replied Aroma with a smile. ‘I thought that as Master Bao had nothing to eat last night and as he spent most of the night tossing in bed, he’d feel rather empty this morning, so I sent the younger maids to order this specially from the kitchen.’

She told the maid to bring up a table, and Musk served Bao-yu with the soup. When he had drunk it and rinsed his mouth, Ripple came in:

‘The room’s ready,’ she said. ‘We’re waiting for the fire to get going properly and the air to clear, and then you can go in, Master Bao.’

He nodded, but was too lost in thought to reply. Shortly afterwards a maid came in to report that his writing things had been laid out. She received a perfunctory acknowledgement from Bao-yu and was immediately followed by another maid, who announced that breakfast was ready and asked where he wanted it served.

‘Oh, just bring it in here,’ said Bao-yu. ‘There’s no need to make all this fuss.’

The maid went out and returned with his breakfast. Bao-yu laughed and turning to Musk and Aroma said:

‘I feel so depressed. I honestly don’t think I could manage this on my own. Why don’t you two join me? That might make the food taste sweeter, and then perhaps I might be able to eat more of it…’

Musk smiled.

‘That’s just a whim of yours, Master Bao. You know it wouldn’t be right for us to eat with you.’

‘I don’t agree,’ said Aroma. ‘We’ve often drunk wine together in the past. I think it can be allowed as an exception, to cheer him up. Though of course as a regular practice it would be quite out of the question.’

So the three of them sat down, Bao-yu at the head and the two maids at either side of the table. After breakfast, one of the junior maids brought in the ‘rinsing’ tea, and Musk and Aroma supervised the clearing of the table. The tea was served and Bao-yu sat in gloomy silence again.

‘Is the room ready yet?’ he asked eventually.

‘Ripple came in earlier on to tell you,’ said Musk. ‘What a silly question!’

After sitting there a moment longer, he made his way over to Skybright’s old room. Having lit a stick of incense and arranged the fruit on the table, he dismissed all the maids and closed the door. Aroma and the others stood outside with bated breath.

He selected a length of pink paper with a gold-splash on it and flower patterns in the corners, said a short prayer, raised his brush and began to write:

FROM GREEN BOY TO SISTER SKYBRIGHT MAY THIS ODE OFFERED WITH LIBATION OF TEA AND BURNING OF PRECIOUS INCENSE FIND ACCEPTANCE IN YOUR SIGHT

O Sweetest and most

Inseparable friend!

Alas! that in so cruel a storm

Your life should end!

Your voice is gone, its tender

Music none can learn.

Forever eastward flows the stream,

Never to return.

Though dreams may never show

Your face to me again,

I see the Peacock Cape and feel

A haunting pain.

When he had finished writing, Bao-yu took a burning joss-stick, held the paper to it and set the ode alight. He sat in silence until the bundle of incense-sticks had burned to the end, then opened the door and walked out.

‘Why are you coming out again so soon?’ inquired Aroma. ‘Are you feeling low again?’

He feigned a laugh.

‘I was rather depressed earlier on. I needed to be on my own for a bit in a quiet place. I feel better now. I think I shall take a stroll.’

He walked straight out into the Garden. When he reached the Naiad’s House, he called from the courtyard:

‘Is Cousin Lin at home?’

‘Who’s that?’ replied Nightingale.

She raised the door-curtain and saw him standing there.

‘Oh it’s you, Master Bao,’ she said with a smile. ‘Miss Lin is inside. Please come in and sit down.’

As Bao-yu went in with her, Dai-yu’s voice could be heard from the inner room:

‘Nightingale, please ask Master Bao to come in and wait a moment.’

Bao-yu, walking towards the inner room, stopped to admire the pair of calligraphic scrolls that hung one on either side of the doorway. The calligraphy looked recent and had been done on strips of dark purple paper, splashed with gold and decorated with a pattern of clouds and dragons. The two lines ran:

Through casement green the moon shines brightly still;

In bamboo chronicles the ancients are but empty words.

Bao-yu read them with an appreciative smile and passed through into the inner room.

‘What are you doing, coz?’ he inquired with a smile.

Dai-yu stood up, took a couple of steps towards him, smiled and said:

‘Please sit down. I’m copying out part of this sutra. I only have two lines left to do. I’ll just finish and then we can sit and chat.’

She told Snowgoose to pour him some tea.

‘Please carry on writing,’ said Bao-yu. ‘Don’t take any notice of me.’

His attention had been caught by a painting hanging on the centre wall of the room. It was a vertical scroll showing Chang E, the Moon Goddess, with one of her attendants, and another fairy, also with an attendant who was carrying what seemed to be a long bag containing clothes. Apart from the clouds that surrounded the figures, there were no background details of any kind. The linear style of the picture was reminiscent of the Song master Li Long-mian. It bore the title ‘The Contest in the Cold’, written in the antique ba-fen style.

‘Have you hung this picture of the Contest in the Cold here recently, coz?’ asked Bao-yu.

‘Yes. I remembered it yesterday while they were tidying the room, and so I brought it out and told them to hang it up.’

‘What’s the allusion in the title?’

Dai-yu laughed.

‘Surely you know! It’s such a well-known poem…’

‘I can’t quite recall it at present,’ confessed Bao-yu, smiling rather sheepishly. ‘Please tell me.’

‘Don’t you remember Li Shang-yin’s lines:

Braving the cold, Fairy Frost and Lady Moon Parade their rival charms…’?

‘Of course!’ exclaimed Bao-yu. ‘How exquisite! And what an unusual subject! This is the perfect time of year to have it up too.’

He continued to amble round the room, inspecting it in a leisurely fashion, and Snowgoose brought him a cup of tea. He drank his tea, and in a few minutes Dai-yu finished the section of the sutra she was copying, and stood up.

‘Forgive me,’ she said.

‘You know you don’t have to stand on ceremony with me,’ he replied with a smile.

He observed that she was wearing a little pale blue fur-lined dress embroidered with flowers, and an ermine-lined sleeveless jacket, while her hair was coiled up in her everyday style and had no flowers in it but only a flat hairpin of purest gold. Her padded underskirt was pink, and embroidered with flowers. How graceful she seemed, as a jade tree leaning in the wind; how gentle, as a fragrant lotus whose petals are moist with dew!

‘Have you been playing your Qin at all these last few days?’ he inquired.

‘Not for a day or two. This sutra-copying makes my hands too cold.’

‘Maybe it’s just as well,’ said Bao-yu. ‘I know the Qin is a fine thing in its way, but I can’t see that it does any real good. I have never heard of it bringing prosperity or long life; it only seems to cause sorrow and distress. And it must be such a labour to memorize those tablatures. I think, coz, that with your delicate constitution you should avoid anything so strenuous.’

Dai-yu smiled somewhat scornfully.

‘Is that the Qin you play?’ Bao-yu went on, pointing to one hanging on the wall. ‘Isn’t it rather short?’

‘Not really,’ explained Dai-yu. ‘When I was a little girl and first started learning, I couldn’t reach on an ordinary Qin, so we had this one specially made. It’s not a collector’s piece of course, made with wood ‘saved from the flames’ – but it has a Crane Fairy and a Phoenix Tail, and the Dragon’s Pool sound-hole and Goose Foot tuning-pegs are all in the correct proportions. And look at the crackling on the varnish. Doesn’t that look just like Cow Hair crackle to you? The fine workmanship gives it a beautiful tone.’

‘Have you been writing any poetry recently, coz?’ Bao-yu went on to inquire.

‘Not much, not since the last meeting of the club.’

He laughed. ‘You can’t fool me. I heard you chanting. How did it go now?

Why grieve to watch The wheel of Karma turn? A moonlike purity remains My constant goal…

I found your setting very striking. You did write it didn’t you?’

Dai-yu: ‘How did you come to hear it?’

Bao-yu: ‘I heard you playing when I was walking back from Smartweed Loggia a few days ago. The music was so lovely and I didn’t want to interrupt you, so I just listened quietly for a while and then went on my way. There is one thing I’ve been meaning to ask you. I noticed that in the first part you use a level-tone rhyme, but suddenly change to an oblique tone at the end. Why is that?’

Dai-yu: ‘That is free composition. One doesn’t have to abide by any rules. One just goes wherever the inspiration takes one.’

Bao-yu: ‘I see! I’m afraid such subtleties were lost on my untrained ears.’

Dai-yu: ‘True lovers of music have always been few.’

Bao-yu realized that without meaning to he had said the wrong thing, and was afraid that he had alienated Dai-yu. He sat there for a while. There was so much he wanted to say, but he was now too nervous to open his mouth again. Dai-yu had also spoken without thinking, and on reflection she wished that she had not been so scathing, and withdrew silently into her shell. Her silence only increased Bao-yu’s own misgivings, and finally in some embarrassment he stood up and said:

‘I must be on my way to see Tan. Please don’t get up.’

‘Give her my regards when you see her, will you?’ said Dai-yu.

‘I will,’ he replied, and departed. Dai-yu saw him to the door, then returned to her chair and sat brooding to herself.

‘Bao-yu’s been so odd recently. He doesn’t seem to say what he’s thinking. He’s friendly one minute and distant the next. I wonder what it means?’

Nightingale came in.

‘Have you finished copying for today, Miss? Shall I put your writing things away now?’

‘i shan’t be doing any more,’ replied Dai-yu. ‘You can clear them away.’

Dai-yu went into the inner room and lay down on her bed, slowly turning all these things over in her mind. Nightingale came in to ask if she would like some tea.

‘No, thank you. I just want to be alone and lie down for a bit.’

‘Very well, Miss.’

Nightingale went out, to find Snowgoose standing in the doorway, staring oddly in front of her. She went up to her and said:

‘What’s the matter with you?’

Snowgoose was lost in thought, and the question gave her quite a turn.

‘Sh! Don’t say a word! I’ve heard something very strange. If I tell you, you must promise not to breathe a word to anyone.’

As she said this Snowgoose shot her lips out in the direction of Dai-yu’s bedroom, then began walking away, nodding to Nightingale to follow her. They reached the foot of the terrace and she began again in a whisper:

‘Have you heard that Bao-yu’s engaged to be married?’

Nightingale gave a start.

‘I don’t believe you! It can’t be true!’

‘It is! Nearly everyone knows except us.’

‘Who told you?’

‘Scribe. His fiancée is a prefect’s daughter. She’s very good-looking and comes from a wealthy family.’

As Snowgoose was speaking, Nightingale heard Dai-yu cough and thought she could hear her getting up again. Worried that she might come out and overhear them, she took Snowgoose by the hand and motioned to her to be silent. She looked inside, but all seemed quiet. She asked Snowgoose in a low whisper:

‘What exactly did Scribe say?’

‘Do you remember,’ replied Snowgoose, ‘a day or two ago you sent me to Miss Tan’s to thank her for something? Well, she wasn’t home, but Scribe was. We started chatting, and one of us happened to mention Master Bao and his naughty ways. Scribe said: “When will Master Bao ever grow up? He doesn’t take anything seriously. And to think that he’s engaged to be married now – and still as silly as ever!” I asked her if the engagement had been settled, and she said that it had and that the go-between was a Mr Wang, a close relation on the Ning-guo side, so the whole thing was a foregone conclusion.’

Nightingale put her head thoughtfully to one side. ‘How very strange!’ she thought to herself.

‘Why has no one in the family mentioned it?’ she asked Snowgoose.

‘That’s Her Old Ladyship’s idea – so Scribe said. It’s in case Bao-yu finds out and is distracted from his studies. She made me promise not to tell a soul, and said she would blame me if word got around.’

Snowgoose pointed towards the house.

That’s why I haven’t mentioned it in front of her. But today when you asked, I thought I could tell you the truth.’

As she was speaking there was a loud squawk from the parrot:

‘Miss Lin’s back! Put the kettle on!’

The two maids had the fright of their lives and turned round expecting to see Dai-yu. But seeing no one, and realizing their mistake, they scolded the bird and went inside. They found Dai-yu at her chair. She was out of breath and had clearly only just sat down. Nightingale asked rather awkwardly if she wanted any tea or water.

‘Where have you two been all this time?’ asked Dai-yu. ‘No one came when I called.’

She walked back to the kang and lay down once more facing the wall, telling them to let down the bed-curtains. They did so and left the room, each secretly thinking to herself that she had overheard them, but neither daring to say so.

Dai-yu, brooding on her bed, had heard them whispering outside and had crept to the door to eavesdrop. Details of their conversation eluded her but the main substance was clear. She felt as though plunged into a great ocean. The prophecy contained in her nightmare was to be fulfilled after all. Bitterness and grief overwhelmed her. There was only one way of escape left. She must die. She must not live to see this dreaded thing take place. Without Bao-yu what would life be worth anyway? She had no parents of her own to turn to. Surely if she neglected herself daily from now on, in a few months she would be able to undermine her health and leave this world and all its troubles behind her?

Having formed this resolution, without bothering to pull up her quilt or put on any extra clothes she closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep. Nightingale and Snowgoose came in several times to wait on her, but seeing no sign of movement did not dare disturb her, even for dinner. Later, when the lamps were lit, Nightingale peeped through the curtains and saw that she had fallen asleep with her covers in a crumpled heap at her feet. Afraid she might catch cold, Nightingale gently pulled them over her. Dai-yu lay still until she had gone, then pushed them back again.

Meanwhile Nightingale questioned Snowgoose again:

‘Are you sure you weren’t making it up?’

‘Of course I wasn’t!’ replied Snowgoose rather indignantly.

Nightingale: ‘But how did Scribe come to know?’

Snowgoose: ‘It was Crimson that heard it first at Mrs Lian’s.’

Nightingale: ‘I think Miss Lin must have overheard us. I can tell that something has upset her greatly. We must be careful never to mention it again.’

The two maids tidied up and made themselves ready for bed. Nightingale went in to see how Dai-yu was and found the quilt in the same crumpled heap as before. She pulled it lightly back. That night passed without further event.

The next morning Dai-yu rose early without waking either of the maids, and sat up on her own, lost in thought. Nightingale awoke to find her already up and said in surprise:

‘You’re up very early this morning, Miss!’

‘I know I am,’ replied Dai-yu rather curtly. ‘It’s because I went to sleep so early last night.’

Nightingale quickly dressed and woke Snowgoose, and the two of them waited on Dai-yu at her toilet. She sat staring into the mirror. Tears began to stream down her face, and her silk scarf was soon wet through. In the poet’s words:

A wasted face

reflected in the spring stream;

And pity flows

from face to mirror’d face

and back again.

Nightingale stood by, not daring to utter a single comforting word, for fear that she would say the wrong thing and cause further anguish. Dai-yu sat motionless for a considerable while, then finally began her morning toilet, negligently, her eyes still brimming with tears. When it was done, she remained sitting where she was for a few minutes, then asked Nightingale to light some of the Tibetan incense.

‘But Miss,’ protested Nightingale, ‘you’ve hardly had any sleep. What do you want to go lighting incense for? You’re surely not going to start copying the sutra again are you?’

Dai-yu nodded.

‘But you woke so early, Miss. If you start writing now you’ll exhaust yourself.’

‘What does that matter? The sooner it’s finished the better. I only want to do it to keep myself occupied anyway. And in days to come you will have my writing to remember me by.’

As she said this tears began to pour down her cheeks, and Nightingale was no longer able to offer consolation but burst into tears herself.

Dai-yu was resolved that from this day forward she would deliberately destroy her health. She soon lost her appetite, and gradually began to waste away. Bao-yu visited her whenever he could after school, but although there were a million things she wanted to tell him, her consciousness that they were no longer children inhibited her from showing her affection by teasing him in the old way, and rendered her powerless to express what was preying on her mind. Bao-yu for his part would have liked to talk with her sincerely and offer her some genuine comfort; but he was afraid of aggravating her illness by offending her in some way, and so when he did see her, he merely inquired politely how she was feeling and added a few words of encouragement. Theirs was a true case of estrangement in the very extremity of love.

Grandmother Jia and Lady Wang showed a motherly concern for Dai-yu, which however went no further than calling in the doctor. Not knowing the inner source of her illness, they put it down to her sickly constitution, and Nightingale and Snowgoose were much too afraid to tell them the truth. Dai-yu weakened day by day. After a fortnight her stomach had shrunk to the point where she could no longer bring herself to eat even gruel. Every conversation she overheard during the day seemed to her to be connected in some way with Bao-yu’s marriage. Every servant she saw from Green Delights seemed to be involved in the preparations. When Aunt Xue came to visit her, Bao-chai’s absence confirmed her suspicions. She began to hope that no one would come to see her. She refused to take her medicine. Her only remaining wish was to be left alone, and to die as quickly as possible. In her dreams she constantly heard people addressing the new ‘Mrs Bao’, and her mind grew totally obsessed with the idea, like the proverbial drinker who, seeing a curved bow reflected in his cup, is convinced that he has swallowed a snake.

A few weeks of this self-imposed starvation and it seemed as if she must soon die. Even the thinnest of gruels was now an impossibility. Her breathing was scarcely perceptible. She was hanging on by the slenderest thread. To learn whether she was to survive this crisis or not, please turn to the next chapter.